…what used to be Vampire Slayer, has turned, as far as I can see, into Vampire Layer. XD

I think Longasc’s question is right on target, and that Jane is certainly getting there in terms of an explanation.

In this post, I only touched on the idea of how Edward fits the archetype of the guy who only acts like a jerk because he’s a tortured soul who needs your love. However, this is an issue I’ve been worried about since long before I had ever heard of Twilight.

So many of our ideas about relationships and romance come from the media, especially movies and advertising. When I came to the hard-won conclusion that a jerk is usually just a jerk, I realized that I’d been had. Yes, we all have to grow and learn from our mistakes, but I started wondering how much needless suffering occurs because of the ubiquity of this relationship model. Of course, that still goes back to Longasc’s question of why the model is so popular. I think the idea of being so special that only you can see the good in someone, and that the person will change just for you, is inherently appealing to a lot of women. The traditional male equivalent would probably be wanting to save and win the girl. Dollhouse has done an unsettlingly good job of exploring how Ballard’s desire to save Echo is heroic on the surface but is creepy and a little selfish when you take a closer look.

I think I’ve projected a lot of my frustration I’ve been having about media portrayal of relationships over the last several years onto Twilight. It’s just such an extreme example of all the problematic elements I’ve been noticing: Bella is special, but her specialness is largely defined by her effect on Edward. Edward is rude to her at first, but it turns out it’s because he loves her, so it’s ok. When Edward leaves Bella, she continues to pine over him until they get back together, with the message being that they just HAD to get back together because they were meant to be, so there was therefore no reason for Bella to, you know, grieve, learn her lessons, and move on. None of this stuff is new, but there’s just so much of it in Twilight. I think the fact that Bella never seems to have to learn any lesson is the most disturbing. She’s so special and wonderful, and if there’s anything she’s not good at, Edward or Jacob will protect her. If she gets lonely, she doesn’t learn to deal with her loneliness and discover how to be happy on her own. Instead, she goes and jumps off a cliff so someone will have to pay attention to her.

I’ve gone on way longer than I intended. I’m not even sure if all this makes sense . . . it’s mostly just me typing out my own thought process as I try to pinpoint exactly what I think and how I feel about all this.

No offense also, but Quinto Spock? If you want to talk about unrealistic basises for relationships, you can’t get much better than that. I was actually shocked with the elevator scene because it was so out of character. Quinto spock always seemed to me to be someone you’d worry about your kid dating, since he is prone to rage, and easily provoked (that scene where kirk convinces him to give over the ship by making him angry really was painful and annoying.)
Dblade´s last blog ..The 11% solution

Let me see… Edward Cullen is an abusive boyfriend, controlling stalker and borderline rapist. Robert Pattinson is… Eh. A regular guy, I guess. I don’t mind his haircut, but I don’t find him attractive at all.

I guess there’s also Jacob, who is the only semi-decent character in the book (before becoming a pedophile), but his motives and love for Bella are uninspiring and unrealistic. In short, he didn’t really make me care about the novels. As for Taylor Lautner, the kid isn’t even legal (is he?) so he didn’t make the movie more enjoyable for me.

In other words, there’s nothing in the story I could care about. As for the other girls… There are only two types of “Twilight” fans: those who are crazy about Edward or Jacob (Robert or Taylor ) and those who have NO idea why they like the books, but continue to like them anyway.

PS- Thanks for this article! It’s always nice to see there are other people who are not crazy about this “phenomenon”.

The same dynamic exists with Buffy and Angel, but unlike Myers, Whedon presents it with skill, grace, and an eye towards challenging the paradigm. That challenge makes his material less accessible to a lot of people, because they don’t see much of that kind of heroism in their own lives.
jane´s last blog ..Briar Rose Learns to Read